


This Life

by RowanBane



Category: Vampire Knight
Genre: Abuse, Broken!Zero, Gay, Gay Male Character, Gen, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Loving!Kaname, M/M, My first fanfic on this site, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Rape/Non-con Elements, Romance, Sexual Abuse, Violence, minor fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-21
Updated: 2016-03-11
Packaged: 2018-04-22 18:18:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4845527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RowanBane/pseuds/RowanBane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zero ran away from his abusive (ex)boyfriend & into the arms of his best friend, Kaname. Little did Zero know, but Kaname has loved Zero ever since high school. Kaname hopes to show Zero what true love is like and that Zero can heal and move on. But what will Zero do when he finds out something big after he realizes that he may be in love with Kaname? Enjoy! Read warnings inside!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 1
> 
> a/n: Holly sh!% I'm back! I have officially become ungrounded from my parents. Reasons for my groundings will not be discussed here because it is quite the story. If you would like to ask me about it, feel free to cooment to me! I know that this first chapter is short, but I swear to the big man in the sky or in the ground, that the next chapters will be longer! This right below is more of a prologue type thing. So please, leave me a C.S.Q(Comment, question, suggestion)!
> 
> Disclaimer: I actually own this story plot, but not the characters . . . I would rather have the characters. :_(
> 
> Thanks to: *Cricket chirping in an empty room labeled my commenters*
> 
> Warning: Un beta'd. Nothing much in this area, just that it's painfully short.
> 
> Side note: LOOK AT THE VERY BOTTOM!
> 
> Enjoy!

The blood dripped behind him as he limped through the dark and cold alley. All he was wearing were dirty boxers with a blood-stained bed sheet wrapped around his pale, shivering body. His silver hair was matted and stuck to his sweat-soaked forehead. His body was so weak. All he wanted to do was sleep forever, but he couldn't because he needed to get away. Freedom was the only thing he had left to hang on to.

His lilac eyes were watery and every now and then a tear would flow down his cheek, passed his bruised neck and onto his naked chest. All he could do was walk forward even though it hurt. He had no idea where to go. The alley would probably end somewhere and hopefully he would know then where to go. He knew that he couldn't go back. He could never go back. He made a decision and he was going to stick with it. That life wasn't for him. He didn't know what other life he could have, but he hoped that it would be better than the one before.

He looked up when he heard the sound of cars passing by. There were a few cars driving by and other cars going in the opposite direction. The stop and go lights were bright and so were the street lights. For some odd reason, this street looked familiar to him. His head was pounding and fuzzy, but he knew this area. The strings of the fancy moderately sized houses that were identical to each other, much like a strait-laced suburban town, were so familiar to him. He has been here before.

He walked outside the alley to get a better look around. People were staring at him from the inside of their cars, he was sure that they were, but he was too out of it and dizzy to care about them. At least there were no people walking on the sidewalk. There were only a few cars on the street. Most of the house lights on both sides of the street were off. That wasn't surprising. It was probably around midnight at the time. He did notice that one of the houses were still lit. The moment that he laid eyes on the still lit house, he finally realized where he was.

He limped as fast as he could to the house. Some car honked at him as he crossed the street desperately. When he finally went in front of the house he felt some relief. He was feeling safety and security as he approached the house. He held on to his sheet that was still wrapped around him with one hand and used his other hand to ring the doorbell. He waited as long as he could without falling unconscious. When the door opened, he wrapped his free arm around the neck of the person who opened the door and said in a broken whisper,

"Help me."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: Hello everyone! I hope to see some of you lovely people again from last time and welcome to anyone who is just joining me. I hope that all of you will like this. I tried my best to make this a good chapter. I put a lot of love into this as well and I hope that some of you appreciate that. Thank you!
> 
> Disclaimer: This plot happens to be mine! The characters in this happen to belong to somebody else though . . .
> 
> Thanks to: sexyfantasy and my lovely gusts!
> 
> Warning: Un beta'd. AU. Possible OOCs. Vampires may be different according on how I want them to be in later chapters.
> 
> Side note(s): Please leave a C.S.Q(Comment. Suggestion. Question). LOOK AT THE VERY BOTTOM!
> 
> Enjoy!

Kaname was frozen when he felt a person cling on to him tight. He could feel a very cold arm curled around his neck and icy fingers tangled in his brown hair to hold Kaname there. The person breathed out a sigh of relief in Kaname's ear and rested their head on the vampire's shoulder. Kaname was about to push them away and demand to know what they were doing here, at his house, at this time of night, hugging him. Before he did so, Kaname stopped completely when heard a broken voice speak out helplessly to him.

"Help me." They whispered.

The vampire's eyes widened. He knew who this person was. Kaname glanced down and recognized the silver hair and pale skin that was attached on his shoulder. This was Zero. Kaname's Zero. But, why was Zero here at this hour of the night?

Kaname concentrated more on what was happening and his senses kicked in. First, Kaname could see what state Zero was in. Zero was wearing a thin white sheet around his cold body and when Kaname looked down a bit, he could that Zero's face was pink from the cold and his cheeks were wet from tears. He was quietly breathing against Kaname's neck. Kaname could only assume that Zero was exhausted for some reson. The next thing Kaname noticed was that he could feel Zero. He was shivering and cold like bitter ice. And finally, Kaname could smell Zero. He picked up Zero's sweet human scent, but he picked up something else. Blood. Fresh blood. And past all of that thick blood was . . .something else. A bodily fluid that Kaname was sure wasn't Zero's. Kaname's heart shattered unexpectedly.

"Zero," Kaname whispered softly. 'My love.' He wanted to add to him. His only reply was Zero's breathing and Zero burying his head in the crook of Kaname's neck further. The pureblood felt Zero cling to him like a lifeline. Kaname slowly used one of his arms to wrap around Zero's waist and his other arm to go under the silverlit's shaking legs. Zero groaned out in pain and Kaname 'shushed' him like Zero was a frightened child waking from a nightmare. Kaname secured Zero safe in his arms and brought him inside the warm house. He used his foot to shut the door behind him as he brought Zero into his home.

Kaname took a moment to figure out where to put his beloved. He was sure that Zero was coming down close to hypothermia. Kaname had read some things on how to treat someone with hypothermia or a person with hypothermia-like symptoms. Knowing somewhat what to do, Kaname walked upstairs to his bedroom with Zero still sheltered in his arms. Zero had both of his arms wrapped around Kaname's neck as tight as he could and buried his face in Kaname's chest for more warmth. Zero's teeth were chattering loud and he bit on Kaname's collar to try to keep quiet. Kaname felt some tears land on his shirt. He knew that Zero was probably embarrassed and hurting at that moment. Kaname wanted nothing more than to take all of Zero's pain away from him.

When they both reached Kaname's bedroom, Kaname tried to get the door open, but with Zero occupying his arms and hands, he couldn't. Frustrated, Kaname kicked the door open. He felt Zero jump slightly from the sound of the door slamming against the wall. The brunette just brought Zero in closer to his body and mumbled, "I'll fix it later." Kaname somehow pushed back the blankets with his elbows and carefully laid Zero on the bed even though Zero was reluctant to let go of Kaname. When Zero was lain on the bed, Kaname tried taking the bloodied sheet from Zero's body because it was wet and cold. Kaname knew that to prevent hypothermia, he would have to remove all the wet clothing from Zero's body as soon as possible. Kaname tried taking the sheet away from Zero, but Zero held onto it and shook his head fiercely.

"Zero, I need to remove this so you can get warm," Kaname said. Zero just shook his head again and mumbled something Kaname didn't hear. "Zero," Kaname warned. Zero looked up slowly into Kaname's eyes with fear and more tears down his cheeks. Kaname's breath hitched and he let go of the sheet. He just scared Zero. He never wanted to do that. Kaname just wanted his angel healthy, not scared. He even made him cry more. Kaname felt a pain in his chest with that look that Zero had given him. Kaname knew that Zero knew that he could get Kaname to do anything for him by using his bright eyes, even when there was fear in them. Kaname hated that look. He had to get this off of Zero, even if it hurts him. Kaname gripped the sheet and ripped it away from Zero's frail body forcefully. Zero gasped and wrapped his arms around himself and crossed his legs. Kaname threw the filthy sheet somewhere on the floor. He didn't care where it went.

He looked down at Zero and cringed. Zero's body was bruised and bloody. His neck was bruised with hand prints just like his hips as well. His lip was busted up and bleeding. His left eye and cheek were starting to bruise to. The blood was coming from Zero's 'backside' as well. Kaname pieced the puzzle together and when he realized what Zero had just been through, Kaname felt pure rage and despair. Zero was raped. He was raped by his no good of a boyfriend and he knew it. He knew that Zero's boyfriend was hitting him, but Zero always begged Kaname not to tell anyone and that it was 'getting better'. This was the last straw, though. Kaname was going to kill the bastard. He was going to make the low-life pay for what he did to Zero. Mark his words.

The pureblood looked back down at Zero after thinking many homicidal thoughts about Zero's boyfriend. The silverlit's face was flushed with embarrassment and sickness from the cold. Kaname saw Zero's blue boxers and could tell that they were bloody and wet too. He would have to get Zero out of those as well. Zero seemed to know what Kaname was thinking because Zero took on a panicked look on his face and crossed his legs tighter together. As much as Kaname would love to see Zero with his boxers off, Kaname wanted nothing more than to take care of his beloved and punch Zero's boyfriend in the face.

Kaname walked back to the side of the bed where Zero was and crouched down to his level.

"Zero, I know that you're frightened, but I am not going to hurt you. I would never do that and you know it." Kaname whispered. Zero looked at him with soft eyes that told him that he agreed with Kaname. Kaname took in a deep breath and said the next thing. "But I need to take your underwear off." Kaname finished. Zero flinched away from Kaname.

"No." Zero rasped in reply. Kaname sighed. He needed to get the last article of clothing off of him. He stood up and looked around. He looked at the blanket that was pushed at the edge of his bed and grabbed it. Kaname put the blanket over Zero's body and watched as Zero started to relax more into the warmth, closing his eyes. Kaname stood over Zero and whispered to him.

"I'm going to take these off, okay?" Kaname asked. Zero kept his eyes closed and shook his head weakly. "I won't look, though," Kaname said. Zero didn't reply, he just kept his eyes closed as if he was asleep. Very carefully, Kaname slipped his hand under the blanket. Zero's hiccupped a sob and Kaname kept whispering to him,"I'm sorry." and "It's okay." over and over again, but he had to do this even though it hurt the both of them. Kaname traced his fingertips up Zero's smooth thigh softly. He found the soft fabric of Zero's underwear. Kaname grabbed the waistband of it and slowly pulled them down. Zero scrunched his eyes in discomfort and shivered. Kaname's nails lightly scratched down Zero's legs. Kaname bit his lip and tried to keep his thoughts at bay. Zero needed him right now and Kaname had to help him, not harm him any further. Kaname moved down the bed with the clothing still bunched in his fist. His other hand reached under the blanket to do the same thing to the other side of the underwear. It was finally wrapped around Zero's ankles and Kaname pulled them off completely.

Kaname threw the boxers on top of the bloodied sheet in the middle of the floor. He looked back to Zero and heard him softly snoring. He was glad that Zero was asleep. Hopefully, his beloved could get some well-deserved rest after this. Kaname breathed in and let the fact sink in the Zero was raped. Kaname has loved Zero ever since their school days in high school and it crushed Kaname that he wasn't there to protect Zero. He knew that Zero wasn't safe with his boyfriend, but Kaname didn't have the heart to take Zero away from someone he loved.

Kaname leaned down and wiped Zero cheek dry of tears and kissed his forehead. Zero, unconsciously, leaned into Kaname's hand and nuzzled it with a small sigh. Kaname slowly dragged his hand away. He quietly left the room with a naked, sleeping Zero in his bed. Kaname walked down the stairs and paced for a good five minutes, thinking about what to do from there on. The vampire finally made the decision to get some help because he didn't know how hurt Zero was and he didn't know if he could help him himself. Kaname pulled out his cell phone from his pants pocket. He needed someone that he trusted and he knew just who to call. He dialed his own personal doctor and close friend then waited as the other line rang.

 

* * *

 

Takuma was asleep when his work phone rang. He opened his eyes slowly and yawned quietly. He lifted up his head from his pillow and looked around the bedroom, groggily. The alarm clock said that it was one-thirty at A.M. Who is calling at this time of night? Takuma wondered. His arm was curled around his husband, Senri, who stirred and groaned in his sleep. Takuma removed his arm gently from Senri's waist and sat up on the bed. He stretched out his arms quickly and picked up his phone to inspect it. The caller I.D read that it was Kaname. Why would Kaname Kuran, of all people, be calling him at this time of night? Takuma tapped accept. He rubbed his eyes and put the phone to his ear.

"Hello?" He tiredly said into the phone. Takuma cracked his neck and Senri kicked him. His husband hated that noise.

"Hey, it's me," Kaname told him. Takuma kissed his husband's hair, avoiding Senri's hands that were swatting him away, before replying to Kaname.

"Yes, I know. I have caller I.D." Takuma yawned again. "Do you know what time it is?"

"I apologize," Kaname replied. "I didn't have anyone else I thought I should call."

"It's fine. What do you need?" Takuma asked.

"Who is it?" Senri whispered.

"Kaname." He whispered back to him and turned his attention back to Kaname, who was still on the other line.

"I need your help. It's a personal emergency." Kaname told Takuma seriously. Takuma straightened up and put on a serious face.

"I'm guessing it is not you that's injured," Takuma stated.

"No, it's not me." Kaname sighed.

"Who is it?" For some reason, the tone in Kaname's voice made Takuma worried.

"It's Zero," Kaname answered. Takuma's eyes widened.

"The man you're still obsessing over?" He questioned.

"I'm not obsessed," Kaname growled.

"Agree to disagree. What does Zero need? What is the current state he's in?" He asked professionally. His doctor side was out.

"I think he has some symptoms of hypothermia and . . ." Kaname dragged off.

"And . . .what, Kaname?" Takuma pressed.

"I know that he was . . . raped." Kaname said. Takuma made a shocked noise in his throat. Senri looked up at him concerned.

"I see." He breathed. " I'm afraid I don't have a rape kit if that's the case-" Takuma started and Senri looked then at him in shock.

"I don't need one. I know who did it. I just need you to come over to check him out. To make sure that he will be fine." Kaname cut Takuma off. Takuma thought about it for a second and looked down at his husband.

"I don't know if I should leave Senri here alone, though . . ." Takuma said. Senri sat up and looked at Takuma.

"I'll be fine." He told him. Takuma didn't answer.

"Please," Kaname said softly over the phone.

"Alright," Takuma told Kaname after a moment of thinking it over more. Senri showed his thanks for Takuma agreeing by pecking Takuma quickly on the lips. Takuma smiled back at him.

"Thank you," Kaname said in a relieved voice.

"Would it be alright if I bring my assistant? He lives a block from here. It's on the way there and I could use some of his things as well." Takuma asked.

"Yes, but please do hurry," Kaname said and hung up.

Takuma let out a deep breath and set the phone down back on the bedside table. Senri looked at him worriedly.

"W-was Kaname . . .?" Senri asked. Takuma shook his head and put an arm around his lover.

"No. It was Kaname's friend." He confirmed. Senri slouched his shoulders in relief of his cousin and flopped back down on the bed. Takuma smiled and stood up from the bed with his work phone back in his hand. "I'm going to get ready and grab my stuff. I'll tell you when I leave." Takuma told Senri. Senri only nodded and snuggled himself back to bed.

Takuma looked at his husband with admiration before going to his work office to grab his coat and his leather bag to put some basic medical essentials in it. He sent a quick text to his assistant saying that he was going over there to pick him up soon for a work emergency. Luckily, his assistant responded right away saying that he would be ready. Takuma responded back to give his thanks and said about what time he would be there.

He packed up his things and put his white doctor's coat on his body. He left his work office to go and say goodbye to his husband. When he walked in he saw Senri peek over his shoulder to look at him. Takuma walked over to him and kissed his forehead.

"Call me if you need anything and don't let anyone in while I'm gone," Takuma told him.

"Hmm." Senri hummed disapprovingly at Takuma's possessive request. He was grown man, but he decided that it was just best to go with it then if he wanted to get any sleep tonight. "Whatever." He mumbled and went back to sleep. Takuma could only smile and chuckle before he left the room to go get his car keys. He got in the car to go get his assistant and help Zero in however way he could.

 

* * *

 

 

Kaname would never admit this, but he was pacing frantically around his living room waiting for Takuma and his assistant to arrive. He would like to think that he was a very level headed person and he was. Don't get him wrong. Although, when it came to his Zero, Kaname could lose himself because of his silver haired man. He could not count the times he has lost his temper because of Zero's horrible boyfriend. Who in their right man would hurt someone like Zero? Sure, he could be a bit rude, stubborn, cold, cocky, and a bit closed off but under all of that was somebody who was naive, gentle, caring, and scared. Zero used to be able to stick up for himself and have confidence.

Eventually, after listening to all of the things that his boyfriend said and did to him, he became timid around others, including Kaname. Which made him lose hold of his temper more so. It was because of Zero's boyfriend that Zero had to hide himself from him. Kaname never wanted that. Even though it would be hard, Kaname wanted to have Zero share things with him and open up to him. It's just what normal couples do with each other. After all of that time being alive, Kaname could use some normalcy. It would be nice to settle down for once in his life. It might be nice to have some stability as long as Zero would be there.

A knock at the door stopped Kaname's pacing and thinking. He assumed that it was Takuma and his assistant. He was grateful that they were coming this late to help him out. It truly did mean a lot. All he could hope for was for Zero to be okay. It would be ideal if this was all a dream, but Kaname was a realist. He didn't waste his time thinking of things that will only slow him down. Zero needed him right away, not five hours from now. So, Kaname went to the door and opened it.

"Hello!" A man smiled instantly. Kaname was a bit taken back from that, but he just gave him an awkward nod. He saw Takuma behind him so that meant that must have been his assistant Takuma was talking about.

"Hanabusa. Move." Takuma commanded. Hanabusa became flustered and he shuffled out of the way. "May we come in," Takuma asked politely when he was in front of the door. Kaname stepped back from the door and held it open for them invitingly.

"Please." He responded simply. Takuma smiled and walked inside with Hanabusa right behind him. Kaname shut the door and locked it when the others were in. When he turned back to look at them, he saw Hanabusa looking around the house like an idiot and Takuma standing straight waiting for instruction.

"Nice house! Are you rich?" Hanabusa

“I am well to do.” Kaname answered curtly. “Follow me, if you will. He is up here.” Kaname said and walked fastly up the stairs. Takuma trailed behind Kaname, while Hanabusa was following the both of them like a runt following their siblings. Once they were all up stairs, Kaname took a deep breath and opened the door. And there in the room was Kaname’s angle. Still sleeping like when Kaname left him.

Takuma immediately walked over to Zero. He looked down at him with a pained look on his face. Takuma couldn’t imagine if this was Senri laying in this bed, hurt. He was going to go everything that he could to help Zero because he was the one that was hurt. Takuma remembered Zero from high school even though they didn’t talk. Takuma always saw Zero as a headstrong person that could defend himself. What happened to Zero was not his fault and he wasn’t weak, but Takuma just couldn’t see Zero like this. Yet here he was.

Zero was a strong person, but how much must a person hurt for them to become truly weak?

* * *

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: So what did you think? I hope you liked it. And don’t be afraid to point out spelling errors or grammar issues. I take it as constructive criticism! I did try my best though, so I do hope that is was okay! Also, was this length okay? I was comfortable with it but what do you guys think? And please leave me a C.S.Q(Comment. Suggestion. Question)! I need them! They truly inspire me! Love you all!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: I am feeling good now and I am so excited about continuing this story! I really hope that you guys like this chapter. Please comment and kudo!
> 
> Disclaimer: Sad but true, I do not own this. I just own the plot! I would rather have Vampire Knight and make everyone gay. I am sure a lot of you do to. :) 
> 
> Thanks to: All of my kudoers!
> 
> Warning: Un beta'd. AU. Possible OOCs. Implied rape, Vampires may be different according on how I want them to be in later chapters.
> 
> Side note(s): Pretty please with gay sprinkles on top, leave me a C.S.Q(Comment, Suggestion, Question). Your coments and kudos really inspire me to write so please help me and give me your amazing feedback!
> 
> Enjoy!

Outside of Kaname’s personal bedroom was a beautifully decorated balcony. Zero was continuing to sleep inside laying on Kaname’s bed while still being checked over by doctors Hanabusa and Takuma. Kaname found that he needed some fresh air and his balcony seem like a perfect place to get some peace. The sun was just rising above the hills giving the sky a lovely color for Kaname to marvel at. The balcony gave Kaname a good view over his property and a small sliver of the everlasting, quiet suburban city. Kaname had his chin in his hand as he balances his elbow on the metal bars of the patio. He took in a deep breath of the crisp morning air as a gust of wind tousled his brown locks.

“Zero.” Kaname murmured to himself. His only thoughts were of his only love. Kaname closed his eyes and clenched his jaw tight. It was selfish to admit, but he was in pain as well. He should be worried for Zero and not himself, but Kaname couldn't help but feel a pain in his chest. Sure, that pain was for Zero, who he loved, but there Kaname was, hiding like a child on his porch. 

After a few hours watching Takuma and Hanabusa tending to Zero, Kaname found that he couldn’t take it anymore. Seeing Zero sleeping exhaustedly and yet still making noises and faces that showed his pain made Kaname want to weep. All of these years of loving Zero and Kaname getting new emotions that he still wasn't used to was tiring. Kaname didn’t have many people that he could confide in, but he wanted nothing more than to do that with Zero. It was confusing. Even his sister, Yuki, who he had always gotten along with, Kaname couldn’t find himself wanting to share his emotions even with her. It had always been Zero who he wanted to talk to. He never got the chance though.

As much as Kaname hated Zero’s boyfriend right from the start, Kaname couldn’t find himself wanting to hurt Zero by hurting his boyfreind. When Zero was being abused, Kaname still couldn't do it because he believed that Zero really loved the guy. The way that Zero would look at Kaname and beg that Kaname wouldn't hurt his boyfriend made Kaname back off once more. It became apparent that though, that Zero didn’t love that man. He was afraid. And it took Kaname too long to realize that.

Kaname was in pain by that fact. He couldn't help but think that Zero was in pain because of him. If only Kaname could had helped sooner rather than later. Zero wouldn’t be in that bed bleeding, sick, betrayed, and in pain. Kaname could have stopped it. He knew that he could have. He felt so guilty. A nagging voice in his head kept on telling him that it was his all fault. Deep down Kaname knew that it wasn’t his all fault, but if Kaname could have just saved Zero before it had come to that, then he and Zero would both be okay. But, Kaname wasn’t there when Zero needed him and that hurt Kaname more than anything else could or would.

He hated himself so much at that point.

The pureblood was brought out of his self-loathing trance by the patio door opening. Red-brown eyes looked over to see who came out here with him. He was looking at Hanabusa. It was funny, Kaname could had sworn that he had seen him somewhere before. He just couldn’t remember and put his finger on where though.

“Hello, Mr.Kuran.” Hanabusa said in a soft voice. The blonde closed the patio door behind him and walked over to Kaname with a nervous smile on his face. Kaname fixed his poster a bit and responded back to him.

“Kaname is fine.” He replied with a polite hand up. Hanabusa just shrugged.

“So, is Mr. Kuran.” Hanabusa shot good-naturedly at him. He walked over to look over the edge of the balcony with the other vampire and looked over at Kaname with a sympathised look. “How are you doing?” He asked. Kaname looked over to him for a moment before looking over the patio once more.

“Fine, I suppose. Why?” Kaname asked back. 

“Well, Takuma didn’t give me much detail, but I have seen many things to put the pieces of the puzzle together.” Hanabusa answered. He took a breath through his nose before adding more to his words. “I know that he was um- you know . . .raped.” He fumbled for that word. “But by the way you look at him and the anger in your eyes tells me that you love Zero.” Hanabusa finished. Kaname looked over at him with some surprise leaking out from him calm demanter.

“I . . .” Kaname tried to find an explanation for what was said to him, but he didn’t want to deny what he felt either.

“Don’t say anything.” Hanabusa stopped him. “Forgive me if my curiosity offends you, but I just wanted to know what's going to happen now?” 

“What do you mean?” Kaname asked confused. 

“I mean, what's going to happen now?” Hanabusa repeated seriously. “I don’t know how many years you have wanted to find someone like Zero, but I can see how much you long for him. So, what’s going to happen now? Are you going to keep longing for Zero from afar? Or are you going to do something about it? Do you even realize how happy you and Zero would be if you just step up to the plate?” Hanabusa ranted.

“Well, I suppose-” Kaname started.

“I mean, what does that bastard who hurt Zero have on you? The great Kaname Kuran. You could make Zero happy. You could protect him. Care for him. Love him.” Hanabusa finished softly. “I don’t mean to boost your ego, but seriously!” Hanabusa vented.

“You’re right.” Kaname said. He knew that he could be so much better to Zero. He just knew it. It was in a vampire's nature to simply protect the ones they loved. Kaname could be just that for Zero. For some reason, just knowing that it had been so simple to have Zero as his made him feel even more guilty. Kaname just couldn’t get over that feeling of utter failure. “You're right.” He repeated.

“After all of these years I can still read you clearly.” Hanabusa said sorrowfully. “You feel guilty.” He stated. Kaname looked over at him and realized something.

“I remember you.” Kaname told him.

“I thought you didn’t remember me.” Hanabusa laughed.

“You were the first boy to confess an attraction to me.” Hanabusa blushed at Kaname’s words.

“Thats right.” He said still blushing and rubbing the back of his neck with an embarrassed chuckle. “We were so young.”

“Only a second year in middle school.” Kaname confirmed. “I remember you telling me you liked me, but what happened after that? You were gone the next year.”

“My father moved for a job one year and then got moved back.” Hanabusa said. “And just in time to. I was so embarrassed.” He finished with a small smile.

“I see.” Kaname murmured with a frown. “I never got to apologize-”

“No don’t worry about it!” Hanabusa interrupted, waving his hands in the air. “You were so easy to read to me and I knew you didn’t like me that way, but I just couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I was way too young to even know what love was!” Hanabusa went on. “But, I found out and I can see what is inside of you for Zero is love.” 

“I think I was a little rude back then though.” Kaname muttered and looked over the balcony, his thoughts back to Zero. Hanabusa looked over to him with his eyebrows knitted together.

“I can see your thinking hard. What’s going to happen now? You have a plan for you and Zero or something?” Hanabusa looked searchingly at Kaname.

“You could say that.” Kaname told him. 

“What is it?” Hanabusa whined playfully.

“It has always been so simple really.” Kaname said walking to enter his room and to go see Zero. Kaname thought for one more moment before answering. Kaname stopped to look back at Habausa from the side. “I’m going to make him mine.” Kaname finished and opened the door to Zero.

“Thats all you're going to say? I want details or I’m going to cry!” Hanabusa ‘threatened’ following him desperately.

“I don’t care.”

“. . .So mean.” Hanabusa whispered as they stepped inside of the room Zero and Takuma were occupying.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Before Kaname left the room to go out to the balcony, Takuma was feeling worried. For hours of working on Zero with his assistant, Kaname looked stressed the entire time. Kaname would pace around the room floor for a long time without stopping. The pureblood would continuously ask how Zero was doing and when he would wake up. He wouldn’t sit down, eat, drink, or anything. Kaname would simply worry himself to death before leaving Zero’s side. The atmosphere in the room was intense. Takuma found himself getting stressed just watching Kaname being so out of character. After being friends with him for as long as he could remember, he wasn’t used to seeing Kaname showing much negative emotion. So, when Kaname finally left the room to get some air, Takuma found the he could breath easier as well. He was relieved the Kaname was taking a breather. The whole situation must had been hard for him. 

Takuma scared himself by thinking if Senri were in that bed, hurt, instead of Zero. He would go mad. If that were Senri in there Takuma would go crazy and have no regrets of whose life he would take. No one messed with Senri or a vampire's mate at that. It has been two years since Senri agreed to officially be Takuma's mate. He had worked so hard for the life he had. He would be dammed if anyone thought that they could just fuck his life up and hurt Senri in the process. Takuma’s eyes darkened and his fists clenched at the thought of losing his husband. Takuma was riled up by just the thoughts of Senri being hurt. By his standards, Kaname was handling this as well as anyone could when someone they love was hurt in a big way like Zero.

“Mr. Ichijo . . .?” Hanabusa called to him nervously. Takuma looked up from the ground and into the concerned eyes of his assistant. Takuma relaxed his posture and looked at Hanabusa with a calm smile.

“Yes?” He responded. Hanabusa bit his lip and avoided his eyes before speaking back to Takuma. 

“You were uh-um growling.” Hanabusa muttered. Takuma looked taken back for a small second before returning to his usual stance. He cleared his throat awkwardly.

“I didn’t realize.” Takuma smile was strained. “I apologize. How is he?” He changed the subject and looked over at Zero. Hanabusa grabbed his clipboard from the nightstand and stumbled over to Takuma. Hanabusa was still in training, but he was always eager to help out his mentor.

“Well, first, Mr. Kiryu temperature is down some, but his fever is still pretty present.” Hanabusa said. “I have also made some predictions on what he may be expecting and I am sure that Mr. Kuran would like to know as well.”

“I am sure he would.” Takuma mused. He looked out a window and saw Kaname leaning over the edge of the balcony. Takuma frowned at the sight. Kaname was in pain much like his precious Zero. He looked back at Hanabusa who was writing frantically on his clipboard. Takuma smiled and called out to him. 

“Hanabusa?” Hanabusa jumped slightly and looked up at him. Takuma knew that he still wasn’t used to being called by his first name, even though Takuma was fine with being called by his first name. Hanabusa was just polite even though he had a big mouth.

“Yes, Mr. Ichijo?” Hanabusa squeaked.

“Would you mind going to check on Kaname.” Takuma asked. Hanabusa’s eyes widened.

“Why me? I don’t know him as well as he knows you. Shouldn’t you be the one to go and make sure he is okay?” Hanabusa questioned curiously.

“I have known him longer, but I think you would have a better effect on him. You have a certain . . . way with words.” Takuma told him.

“I-I don’t know.” Hanabusa stuttered and blushed. 

“It’s been awhile. You both were young back then. No need to be embarrassed.” Takuma smiled reassuringly.

“I’m not!” Hanabusa denied. “I just don’t want to make him uncomfortable . . .” He muttered.

“You won’t.” Takuma said.

“Fine.” Habausa reponed and headed to the patio door. 

Takuma smiled as he left. Hanabusa had an effect to make people feel better and Kaname seemed like he needed just that.Besides, Hanabusa couldn’t avoid Kaname forever. And since Hanabusa was gone and Takuma was basically alone . . .He was going to call Senri and tell him how much he loved him. Even if Senri yelled at him for doing so and demanded him to sleep on the couch. Senri always ended up joining him anyway.

Takuma smiled and pulled out his cell phone.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When Kaname and Hanabusa walked back into the bedroom, they were both greeted by the smiling face of Takuma, who had just put his phone back in his pocket. Kaname immediately went over to Zero. The silverlit was still asleep. His face managed to get some color back, but his bruises and cuts looked worse. His cut lip was healed over with dried blood on it and his eye was swollen. Zero’s cheek was bruised just like his neck and Kaname was sure that his hips were the same as well.

Kaname sighed and felt more guilt shoot him through like a lightning bolt. He winced when Zero groaned. He was hoping that his love would at least wake up, but Zero just stilled and slept on. Kaname let his finger tips dance on one of Zero cheeks before he stepped away from Zero and looked back at Takuma.

“What can you tell me?” Kaname asked. Takuma looked at Hanabusa, who picked up his clipboard and walked over to Kaname.

“Well, Mr. Kiryu , has obviously been through a lot.” Hanabusa started. “His injuries, while many, shouldn’t effect him permanently. He can expect soreness from severe exhaustion and loss of energy. He is running a fever from being in the cold for so long with no proper clothing. The bleeding has stopped in his ‘bottom region’, but his injuries there will also cause soreness, tenderness, and discomfort.” Hanabusa finished. Kaname clenched his jaw and took a deep breath through his nose.

“Alright.” Kaname breathed curtly. “So, what will help him now?” 

“Well,” Takuma began. “I am simply suggesting simple pain killers for the time being. There seems to be no infection but if one happens to surface, then just get some cream or alcohol or call us and we will be happy to help.”

“Do you know when he might wake up?” Kaname asked.

“He is very exhausted, so, it all depends on when he will wake up.” Takuma answered.

“Very well.” Kaname whispered. He turned to Takuma and Hanabusa. “Would you guys like a drink or anything while you're here?” Kaname asked.

“Actually,” Takuma said. “I think I should get home to Senri. My couch is waiting for me at home.” He finished with a smirk. Kaname nodded and looked back to Hanabusa individually.

“No, I think I should be going home soon as well.” Hanabusa replied with a smile. “I will make sure to give you my number just in case to. I am always here to help!” He cheered.

“Give me a call when he wakes up.” Takuma told him.

“I’ll show you out then.” Kaname said to them politely. 

All three of the men walked out the door, following Kaname’s lead, down the stairs, and leaving Zero to wake up after a moment wondering where the hell he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: So what did you think? I hope you liked it. And don’t be afraid to point out spelling errors or grammar issues. I take it as constructive criticism! And omg, Zero is going to wake up in the next chapter! So, from here on out the chapter so get more interesting. I hope that soon we can see some Zero and Kaname loving! I did try my best though on this chapter, so I do hope that is was okay! And please leave me a C.S.Q(Comment. Suggestion. Question)! I need them! They truly inspire me! Love you all!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 4
> 
> a/n: Okay, you guys, I am going to tell you this right now, I think this is a good chapter deserving of some comments and kudos! I happen to like it, but if you don't please tell me! I really want to do good on this story!
> 
> Also, I got my first job! It's at McDonald and my first day is tomorrow! I am so nervous, but I really feel like I can juggle school, work, and writing altogether! So, there should be no worry there!
> 
> I hope you guys like this chapter, please tell me if you do or don't! And you all know what helps me update! KUDOS AND COMMENTS! Please leave me some feedback and let me know how this is going! Thank you!
> 
> Disclaimer: Is not mine . . . Just the plot!
> 
> Thanks to: My kudoers
> 
> Warning: Un beta'd. AU. Possible OOCs. Implied rape, Vampires may be different according on how I want them to be in later chapters.
> 
> Side note: You should notice that throughout this chapter there will be the words him, his, he underlined. This means that Zero's boyfriend is being talked about. I hope this doesn't get you confused. I tried to put in Zero's name in it a lot so you won't get confused, but I don't want it to sound overused. Tell me if there are any problems here!
> 
> Enjoy!

* * *

Zero remembered it like it was only yesterday. It was the first day of school, the starting of his Senior year. He was Seventeen when he met him. He was so handsome and could make anyone's heart flutter and knees weak. He did just that to Zero. Out of anyone to flirt with, he chose Zero.  _Zero_. The quiet and stubborn little Zero. Zero, who was so flustered to even introduce himself that his friend had to do it for him.

His head was fuzzy and he immediately thought he was 'the one'. Zero was so young, virgin, and naÏve to even realize that he didn't even know him and shouldn't be so obsessed. But he was so kind and his smile made him feel as if he could touch the sky from the ground. Zero thought he was so high in love he didn't think. He simply kept getting higher and higher until he was up there with him, touching the clouds.

Somewhere in September, not quite the end of the month, Zero started to talk to him more and more. He got his phone number and would call him at night when his parents were in bed. They became close. Very close. He would give Zero lingering touches that he tried to figure out. He didn't know if it meant they were dating. He had no experience to know if they were. At the time, Zero hadn't even had his first kiss. He was so inexperienced. He let the touches slide because it was nice to be wanted and touched.

Zero had one crush prior to him but it was unrequited and he got over it when he felt unwanted. When he touched him, though, Zero felt wanted. All of the hugs he gave him made him feel more and more loved. He never admitted it because he was stubborn and he felt he had to keep up his tough image, but he cut through that like his image was jello. He saw through him like no one else did. He found out what he liked and gave it to Zero. He had never felt so  _warm_  like that besides his first crush. That was back in grade school, though. Zero was completely over it by the time he first kissed him.

They had known each other for about three weeks when he kissed Zero. Immediately after that he told everyone that Zero was dating him. He was shocked to hear what he said, but in his mind he saw it as an inner fantasy that anyone would long for. The cute guy taking to a nobody like him. It was all quite romantic at the time. Zero felt that he loved him and Zero seemed to force himself to think he loved him back. Because he was so head over heels Zero did whatever he asked, no matter what. He made Zero do things that he should have been ashamed of.

Everything his parents said about respecting yourself flew out the window when he looked at Zero with such lust. He never asked if he was comfortable with it. He only told him that it was okay and that Zero shouldn't be a baby about it, that it was only his body. He was sure that he was right, though. It was only Zero's body, but why did it hurt so much? Why did it tear Zero to pieces when he took from him and gave Zero nothing in return? Why did Zero's heart break when he turned away to sleep while he lied awake crying and in pain?

After all of the rough and dirty sex, all he wanted was more and more of Zero. He took his body, his self-respect, and eventually, his life. He told him when to call him, who he couldn't be friends with, when to be home, and why Zero couldn't go into school without him latched to his side. He only thought that he was just going through a rough patch in his life. Zero found this not to be true when he made a mistake.

Zero went to his friend's house to hang out with them for a little while. He forgot to call him and he was mad. After leaving his friend's home, Zero arrived at his house to see him there. He was leaning on his car, not looking at Zero when he said hello. Zero walked up to him to give him a hug. He stopped his arms from going around him and he coldly asked Zero where he was. Zero should have lied. Zero really should have instead of telling him the truth. When Zero honestly told him where he was, he told him to get into his car. Zero asked why, but he then raised his voice and told him the same thing, get in the car. Fear struck him hard so he got in his car. The way he raised his voice terrified Zero.

They drove for about a half hour before they stopped. Zero looked out the window to see a place he was not very familiar with. It looked like a forest. He said nothing as he got out of the car. He came over to his side and opened the door. He clumsily unbuckled Zero's seat belt and pulled him roughly out of the car to where the front hood was. Zero told him that he was hurting him, but he gripped his arms tighter and shook him like an earthquake. Zero became dizzy and his arm felt like it was going to break.

He then grabbed his chin hard and scowled at him in disgust. He tried to struggle, but his grip was so strong Zero felt like his jaw was going to be ripped off. Zero heard him growl and then moan sickly. He turned Zero around and threw him on the hood of his car face down, spread his legs, and . . . Zero tried to struggle again, but he held him down with his body and his hands. He called Zero a bitch, a slut, and whore. He remembered him asking Zero why he was crying. At that point, Zero just held still and took what he thought he deserved. He licked his tears while cooing to him in a sick voice how his sadness tastes good and that he looked so pretty being so helpless underneath him.

When he was finished with him, he zipped up his pants, and Zero put his underwear and pants back on. Zero's whole body was sore from being repeatedly pushed on the car hood and forcefully taken. He limped to the car door. They both didn't say a word when he fired up the engine.

Zero had tears flowing down his cheeks, but he didn't dare make a sound. His heart was beating and he felt so broken. So used. So hurt. He looked out the window and thought about why he did what he did. Zero thought that he must have done something to deserve it. He didn't know what he did, though.

And from then on he never knew.

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Zero gasped when he woke up from a dark memory that he dreamt about. Pants escaped his lips as he tried to get the horrible images of him out of his mind. Zero had plenty of nightmares and he still wasn't used to them. He was used to living in his own nightmare, but he hated to have to relive them when he was allowed to rest. Most people would see sleep as the time when they were able to decompress from the day they had, but not Zero.

Only when he said Zero could sleep he could sleep. He was sometimes forced to stay awake just in case he needed him for something or he just needed a punching bag. Zero found it hard to trust anyone else, but himself. Many people were cruel to Zero, so why should he trust anyone? The one person Zero had trusted with his life hurt him in more ways than one.

Zero wanted to believe that he could still trust his friend Kaname, but it had been so long since they had seen each other. Zero was told that he couldn't see Kaname because they used to be so close to each other. True, Zero didn't like people, but Kaname was different. Kaname was a really good person to Zero.

No matter how hard Zero tried to keep to himself and get others away from him, people just wouldn't leave him alone. Even though he was a loner people still got to him. Just like Kaname. It was a hard battle to keep the older male away from him, but Zero lost and was fine with it after a while. At first Zero thought Kaname to be full of himself and selfish, but he only found out that Kaname was the exact opposite of that. Kaname was insightful and considerate even though he was rich and could get anything that he wanted without kindness.

Zero eventually found that he could trust Kaname and confide in him with his troubles. In their high school days, they would text each other constantly and hang out together on weekends. In everyone else's eyes, the two of them seemed to be inseparable. Kaname actually went out of his own way to be around Zero and Zero actually didn't push him away like he did to everyone who tried to get close to him.

It was different since Zero was in the situation he was in now. He was unsure if he could ever trust another person like he used to with Kaname. So many things had changed since he had started a relationship with him. One day, Zero hoped that thing will get better or he could just wake up in paradise.

Zero opened his eyes, ready for another day in hell. He found that one of his eyes wasn't opening. It felt as if it were swollen shut. Zero suddenly became confused. Why was his eye swollen? The silverlit used his good eye to look around. A sudden wave of dream hit him. This wasn't his bed. This wasn't his room.

Zero tried to sit up, but when he was almost sitting on his own, he fell back down on the bed when sharp stabs of pain hit him. His head was pounding, his back sore, and his entire body just aching. Zero breathed out and clenched his fists into balls as he tried not to cry out from the sudden pain he was feeling.

Zero felt even more terrified. There he was in a different place with his body hurting all over. So, what the hell had happened to him?

Gingerly, Zero brought a hand up to his swollen eye and let his fingers ghost over it. He wished that he could sit up and inspect his body more than just laying down and feeling his face. Zero wanted to know what happened. He didn't remember him doing this to Zero, but it would make sense. This wasn't the first time Zero has been hurt this bad, but if he did this to him, Zero should be able to remember it.

Zero brought his fingers away from his eye and softly slid them down his face, to his lips and flinched when he felt a small pinch of pain when he touched a cut. His hand fell down beside him on the bed and he licked his bottom lip. He could taste the dried up blood on the tip of his tongue. He looked up at the ceiling and his eyes widened when he saw an image of himself walking in the streets at night with a thin blood spotted sheet around his body. Zero had an idea for what really happened, but it didn't tell him where he was. Zero tried to recall what happened after that.

He saw himself on Kaname's doorstep ringing the doorbell desperately to get help. Then, Zero remembered falling into Kaname's arms practically naked. A blush, that he couldn't help, crawled up onto his cheeks. How improper of himself, Zero thought.

Zero felt a sudden rush of guilt wash over him. Why didn't he just go to a hospital instead of burdening Kaname with his injuries that were caused by his own wrong doings? He let out a frustrated sigh and cursed at himself for being too stupid. There were so many other things he could have done instead of walking all the way to Kaname's house when . . .

he was much closer to the hospital than his old friend's home . . .

Wait.

Why did he go to Kaname's house when he could have gotten help at the local hospital?

What if his instincts made him go to Kaname because he could still trust him? But that was impossible. Zero couldn't trust anyone ever again, right? After all of the things he had been through how could bring himself to trust anyone every again. If he were still in high school it would be easier for him to trust people. Even then he had a hard time with trust issues, but now it just seemed impossible.

He had changed so much since he last saw Kaname. He was anxious all time and wouldn't be able to help, but flinch if Kaname tried to touch him, even if the touch was in a friendly way. Zero wasn't sure what Kaname would think when he saw Zero like this. Broken and scarred. It would be too hard to be Kaname's friend. Zero would only bring him down and he didn't want Kaname to feel like that. Kaname was too good of a person to be around Zero's broken heart.

With a sudden feeling to run away before Kaname could see him, Zero tried to sit up once more. He clenched his jaw and hissed through his teeth. It was so hard for him just to sit up, he had no idea how he was going to make a stealthy escape, but he had to try. With shaky arms, he supported his body to sit. He let out a breath and gave up. Zero didn't know how he was going to even stand with all of the pain he felt.

Maybe it would be fine if Zero just stayed there. He couldn't deny that he had been wanting to see Kaname for a while. Besides, Zero knew Kaname to be a sensible and caring person. It was probably only in Zero's head that something bad would happen if he stayed. He couldn't move so comfortable anyway and he missed Kaname.

Zero groaned at himself. Why does he always have to contradict himself and not be able to just make a decision? Stay here with Kaname or go back to  _him_? Zero shuddered.

"What are you doing, Zero?" He asked himself.

"Yes, what are you doing?" A voice asked. Zero turned his head and gasped when he saw Kaname coolly leaned against the door frame. Zero hadn't even heard the door opened. His heart beat faster at the sight of Kaname. It was almost like Zero had forgotten what the other had looked liked, but it was indeed the same Kaname that he knew.

"Kaname." Zero murmured as he continued to stare at the brunette. Kaname stood up straight and walked up to Zero. Zero felt incredibly small with Kaname looming over him. The silverlit let out a grunt when a hand on his chest pinned him on the bed. Zero glared up at Kaname who simply looked at him with a stoic face.

"You shouldn't be putting stress on your body." Kaname told him. "Lay back, I'll get you something to drink." Zero realized how thirsty he was and licked at his lips and swallowed dryly, eager for something to soothe his dry and sore throat. Zero's eyes followed Kaname's body and watched as the older male poured him a cup of water from a pitcher sitting on the nightstand by the bed.

When the glass was full Kaname leaned down to Zero and put the glass to his lips. Zero felt embarrassed and awkward having Kaname help him drink, but then again, Zero would probably spill water all over himself and make a mess. He wouldn't want to make a mess for Kaname and get him angry. So, Zero just opened his mouth and let the water slide down his throat. Zero gulped eagerly and when he was done, he let Kaname take the glass away. Kaname set the glass down and looked back to Zero.

"Thanks." Zero said, licking his lips.

"You gave us quite a scare." Kaname replied.

"Us?" Zero asked. Kaname nodded.

"My personal doctor Takuma Ichijo and his assistant Hanabusa Aido." Kaname told him.

"They won't tell anyone?" Zero asked nervously.

"I was right in thinking that you wouldn't want anyone to know." Kaname said. "Takuma runs and owns a private office that deals with physical and mental health and he doesn't just let anyone work there. I don't trust hospitals with my matters, but I trust him with my life. Both him and his assistant are very professional. They won't tell anyone what they saw, Zero."

Zero nodded his head. Of course, he didn't want anyone to know about him. He was embarrassed for letting himself being so weak and defenseless. At least, Kaname's doctors or whatever they were would be discreet. Zero knew that the doctors saw him  _there_ , which must have been why he was naked at that point.

"Well, thanks for everything, Kaname. But, I need to get going." Zero said forcing himself to sit up and wincing when he did. "Do you have any clothes I can borrow." Zero finished rubbing his sore back.

"You think I'm going to let you leave?" Kaname questioned pushing Zero back down to the bed. Zero looked back up to Kaname with shock and fear in his eyes. His fear only grew when he saw that the other male was indeed serious about not letting him leave.

"K-kaname." Zero stuttered fearfully. Kaname, realizing that he scared the silverlit put both of his hands on Zero's shoulders.

"No, Zero, no." Kaname said, getting Zero's attention. "I just that I can't let you leave. Where will you go? Back to him?" Kaname asked with disgust.

"Hey!" Zero yelled up at Kaname. "You have no right! You don't know what happened between  _us_!" Zero defended. Then Kaname started to get upset.

"Don't I zero?" Kaname said. "You think I didn't know what happened? I could smell the blood! The fear! The sex! It was all over you! Don't you see that this is not healthy! I care about you Zero and if he did too, he wouldn't hurt you! I need you stay and be safe with me! I'll protect you, Zero!" Kaname yelled back.

Zero looked at Kaname with wide eyes. No one had ever said anything like that with truth in their words. He had said something similar, but it was a lie. But, Zero truly believed that Kaname was speaking the truth. The honesty and passion in his eyes told Zero that. It had been a long time since Zero felt so safe and . . . cared for. Would Kaname really protect him?

Without even realizing it, Zero started to cry. He started to cry for all of the times he was hurt by the one he loved. He sobbed for himself as well. Zero wanted to be better than what he was then. He wanted to be himself again. He wanted to sleep and wake up safe and no longer have to fear that he would be hit or raped to please someone else. Zero wanted freedom again.

"Oh, Zero." Kaname whispered. Zero looked up at Kaname with watery and despaired lavender eyes. Kaname immediately leaned down to Zero and wrapped his arms around him. Kaname was surprised when he felt Zero's arms around his neck, pulling him closer, and buried his face in Kaname's shoulder and sobbed his heart out. Kaname fixed the awkward position from hugging Zero from standing above him, to rolling them both over on the bed and holding the embrace lying chest to chest.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Both of them held onto each other until Zero fell asleep in Kaname's arms. The vampire looked down to Zero and saw him with his hands planted on Kaname's chest and his head on Kaname shoulder. Kaname could feel Zero's soft breath on his neck. Kaname felt bad for pushing Zero far, but Kaname felt that the dam needed to be broken and emptied of all of the dirty water before it could be fixed and filled with new and clean water. Crying was the first step on the path to being healed.

Kaname's eyes glowed red with a sudden rage then he couldn't bury and his fangs throbbed with a primal urge to . . . kill.

Kaname's plan was in effect. He would keep Zero here and take care of him like he should be taken care of. And when Zero was officially his, then Kaname would be selfish and take his revenge for both him and his beloved Zero. No one crossed Kaname Kuran and his mate without suffering the consequences of their actions.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: So did you like it? Or did you hate it? Please tell me! I really want some review! They are the best thing ever! Also, please, please, please don't be afraid to point out any spelling or grammar issues or even if something doesn't make sense in the chapter or previous chapters. Thank you all so much and please KUDO AND COMMENT!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 5
> 
> a/n: You guys, I am so sorry for the wait! I have been going through some tough things right now. I know how long it is and I am so sorry. I am not having trouble with how the story will go and I hope that you guys will follow me through this story until the end. Please review if you could take a moment. 
> 
> Disclaimer: WHY CAN’T IT BE MINE!!! 
> 
> I would like to give thanks to all who have reviewed, followed, and favorited my story. I hope that I will see some familiar people back for this chapter and it always warms my heart to see some new names! 
> 
> Warning: Un beta'd. AU. Possible OOCs. Implied rape, Vampires may be different according to how I want them to be in later chapters.
> 
> Enjoy!

 

 

Something was indeed changing inside of Kaname. He used to be so controlled and composed with himself. He used to be able to keep his emotions at bay and locked away from others. Lately, though, he had been feeling out of the ordinary or something. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it. It seemed to have started ever since Kaname found Zero beaten and hurt on his doorstep. Kaname was feeling as if he were losing himself and falling to a dark place he didn’t want to fall into.

 

He knew that Zero was his world and Kaname was just as compliant to be his sun and revolve around him, but what was this feeling he was being possessed with? His true nature was something he had to come to terms with like everyone else had to with their true nature, but Kaname was losing control. His primal instinct to attack and protect screamed loudly in his mind as he held Zero in his arms. And it was a call that would be hard to ignore.

 

Kaname turned into a broken record thinking and saying how he was going to take care of Zero as he should have been taken care of. He wanted to protect Zero more than Kaname wanted to Zero to love him back. He wanted Zero happy, he needed Zero happy. 

 

The vampire told himself that he could love and be with Zero without falling into an obsession. He wanted to be with Zero without hurting him. Kaname didn’t want to keep Zero locked away from everyone  but himself. He didn’t want Zero’s life experiences to end because Kaname was selfish. But, that was the problem. Kaname wanted more than just Zero’s well-being. He wanted Zero to be his. He wanted the right to stake claim on the silverlit. He wanted to take.

 

Kaname always had of fear held in the back of his mind about falling into an obsession. Many other vampires, no matter what class they were in, could be driven insane by someone they were infatuated with. The one who were infatuated would lock away their mates in fear that someone would take them away. Kaname didn’t want that to happen, but he couldn’t deny that it didn’t sound appealing to keep Zero all to himself and eliminating the risk of someone taking his Zero away. Perhaps he was feeling this way because of all the years he had to hold himself back for Zero’s sake. But, look where that got the both of them. Zero hurt and Kaname guilty and repressed.

 

Kaname snapped out of his thoughts when Zero mumbled something in his sleep and stirred in the purebloods arms. Zero’s faced looked distressed as if he were having a bad dream or memory. Kaname felt more of the guilt he was having before. If only he could have been there for Zero. What right did Kaname have to say he loved Zero if he couldn’t protect him? Kaname felt like a poor version of a vampire who was supposed to protect their mate. Kaname hated this. He hated having his emotions come without his consent. 

 

Kaname glared at nothing in particular, but he was upset. He was glaring at himself he supposed. Everything was changing. He hoped that in the end it would be for the better. There would be no more hurt and pain for the both of them. Kaname could only wish for the both of them that something good would come out of this.

 

* * *

 

The last thing that Zero recalled was falling asleep in a certain person’s arms after crying like a helpless child. But, there Zero was with his tears dried upon his cheeks and laying in a bed by himself. Did Kaname leave? He must have. It would have been stupid of the Zero to think that Kaname would hold him when the brunette had more important things to do. He couldn’t help but miss that warmth wrapped around him that he was enveloped in for a short time.

 

Zero sat up from the bed and noticed that the pain wasn’t so bad anymore. He just felt really stiff and sore, especially his lower back. At least, he could manage to sit up on his own. After he managed to sit up he slowly moved his legs so that they went over the side of the bed. Slowly, Zero pressed his pale feet to the cool floor. Zero shivered and pushed himself closer to the edge so his knees were bent up towards his chest. The silverlit looked around the room and settled his gazed on the nightside table by the bed. His one hand grabbed onto it while his other was placed flat on the bed as he got ready to push himself up. Zero took a breath as he tried to stand on his own. 

 

He hissed when a sharp pain hit his back and he flopped back down onto his rear. He let out a soft cry when he did that. Zero had to bit his lip in order not to make any more pathetic noises. Zero pushed himself up one more and threw himself on the nearest wall. He leaned on the wall for support and braced his hands on it. He let out a breath he was holding as he put his forehead against the wall and sighed in relief. The door was right next to him and Zero was about to head for it when he felt his bare thigh brush against the wall. 

 

Zero groaned. He was naked. Still.

 

Desperately, he looked around the room again for something he could wear. Zero looked for something he could cover up with when he found a rocking chair with neatly folded clothes on the seat. He hesitantly wobbled over to them and looked them over. Did Kaname set them out for him? Zero really hoped so, because he couldn’t wander around Kaname house naked. He couldn’t stay in bed either. Zero could barely remember last night. He only knew that it was a short conversation and that they still had much more to talk about. 

 

Zero struggled to get dressed and set out to find Kaname.

 

* * *

 

 

Kaname was a bit shocked to see Zero standing in front of him, just staring. After a little while of just their eyes gazing at to and into each other, Kaname took a step forward.

 

“Zero.” Kaname murmured. He looked around and saw the kitchen. “Come with me. You must be in need of some refreshments.” Zero simply nodded and followed behind him. He found himself tongue-tied and didn’t know what to say the other. He came down with such confidence to confront Kaname and talk, but all he did now was stay silent.

 

“Water? Coffee?” Kaname asked when the two of them entered the kitchen. Zero sat down at the island in the middle of the room.

 

“I could use so coffee,” He said. “Black, please.” Kaname nodded and poured a cup. He walked over to the island surface and slid the cup over to him before sitting down opposite of Zero.

 

“Thanks,” Zero told Kaname taking a careful sip.

 

“How are you feeling today,” Kaname questioned.

 

“I’m fine.” Zero replied. “I wanted to apologize for yesterday.”

 

“For what?”

 

“You know. . .” Zero guestered. “The whole me coming to your house in the middle of the night without waringin, taking your bed, getting tears and snot on your shoulder, taking your clothes-”

 

“Zero, enough.” Kaname interrupted. “It fine. I was and am worried about you. You would have done the same for me.” Zero looked down at his coffee and nodded. He would have done the same for Kaname in a heartbeat.

 

“Okay,” He whispered. “I also want to say thank you . . . for everything.”

 

“Please don’t worry about it.” Kaname safely said back.

 

“I really hate to do this.” Zero said after taking another gulp of his coffee. “But, may I use your phone.” Kaname raised an eyebrow.

 

“Why?” He asked suspiciously. Zero squirmed and drummed his fingers on the marble surface, looking down.

 

“I need a ride,” He said nervously, still avoid Kaname’s gaze. “Back . . . home.” Kaname crossed his legs and stared dangerously at Zero.

 

“Back to him?” He bit out lowly. “Zero, how could you even think of going back after what he’s done to you?” Zero pursed his lips sourly.

 

“Kaname you don’t understand-”

 

“Really?” Kaname growled, standing up at that point. “I think I would understand more than anyone. Does he even kiss you without having sex? Or what about holding you when you're sad like I did last night? Please find some sense and not go back to him! Your boyfriend should never do something like that. Don’t you see?” Zero looked up at Kaname slowly after he finished his rant.

 

“Ex.” Zero remarked emotionlessly.

 

“Excuse me?” Kaname asked lowering himself back into his seat.

 

“My ex-boyfriend, Kaname.” Zero softly told him. “Why do you think he lashed out like this to me? It was worse than all the other times.” Kaname winced when Zero said ‘Other times’.

 

“Zero.” He pled. “Tell me what happened.” Zero wonder for a moment if he really should tell Kaname instead of lying, but Kaname deserved to know after all he had done for him.

 

“I was thinking about it, breaking up that is.” Zero explained. “I was going to leave a note for him and find a motel to stay at, but I didn’t feel right about that. Even with all he had done to me I still wanted to be decent to him. So, I waited for him to come home from poker night with his friends. I had my bags packed and ready to go.” Zero took a deep breath and Kaname walked over to Zero without a word. He sat next to Zero and wrapped an arm around him. Zero looked up at Kaname and leaned his head on his shoulder before speaking once more.

 

“He came in and stopped to look at me.”

 

_ “What are you doing?” He said. Zero looked at him nervously and glanced at his bags. “Going somewhere?” He snarled with anger in his eyes. Zero backed up and knew he should have just left when he had the chance. _

 

“He g-grabbed at my hair and forced me into our bedroom. And then-then he-he y-you know.” Zero sniffed and stuttered. Kaname squeezed Zero in comfort. “When he was done I grabbed the lamp and hit him. He passed out on top of me and some I got cut by some of the glass. I grabbed the bed sheet and ran. I tripped on the ground a couple of times and more blood ran down my body. Next thing I know I showed up at your door and here we are I supposed.” Zero looked up at Kaname expecting him to say at least something.

 

“Then why do you want to go back?” Kaname asked stroking Zeros silver hair.

 

“I can’t stay here.” Zero sighed and wiped his eyes and nose.

 

“Why not?” Kaname urged. Zero looked at him like he was crazy.

 

“Really?” Zero said leaning off of Kaname. “Kaname, I’m not a freeloader.”

 

“I never said you were.”

 

“I don’t have money anymore.”

 

“You don’t need to.”

 

“Or a job.”

 

“I have one.”

 

“I don’t even have any of my own clothes.”

  
  


“I’ll buy you some.”

 

“Kaname!”

 

“Yes?”

 

“I don’t want to take advantage of you!” Zero stressed.

 

“You won’t be. I have more money than I know what to do with. You're still hurt and I want to make sure that you're properly taken care of.” Kaname told Zero.

 

“I can take care of myself.” Zero scoffed. Kaname raised an eyebrow at him. “Don’t respond to that. The point is that you have already done enough for me and I don’t need you to worry yourself about me anymore.”

 

“I would be more worried if you weren't in my presence.” Kaname clarified. Zero stood off of the chair and walked over to the sink. Kaname’s eyes followed Zero’s back as he placed his cup in the sink. Zero sighed and looked out a nearby window.

 

“Sometimes I can’t believe how things change.” Zero though out loud. “I remember in high school how I thought I would go to college, get a job, have a house, and family. I never got to do any of that. I always pictured myself being successful like my parents wanted me to be. I used to have dreams, but now they're gone. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.”

 

“Zero, you can still do those things,” Kaname said.

 

“Yeah.” Zero scoffed. “Whatever you say.”

 

“I mean it,” Kaname told him seriously. Zero looked at him for a moment before shaking his head.

 

“I really don’t have anything left.” Zero spoke. Kaname stood up and walked towards Zero. He stood behind him and placed his hand on his shoulders.

 

“Yes, you do.” Me.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a/n: Ta da! What do you think? This was way shorter thank all of my other chapters, I still hope that it was good, though. Please leave a C.S.Q(Comment, Question, Suggestion) and I hope that you will stay with me! Your reviews honestly help me so much so don’t be shy! Have a good rest of the day!
> 
> Also, please support me on Fanfiction under the same pen name!

**Author's Note:**

> I hoped that you liked it! Please leave your comments and kudos for me!


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